99 Lives

Time for another video game analogy,
She wins, flawless victory, fatality.
Eyes locked on the pretty girl of the party;
Insert my coins.

Let's get this party started right,
Slide up to this girl with perfect timing.
She smiles at somebody just behind me.
Mind locks when I go to say the perfect line.
She passes me by.
Denied.
Let me try this all again.

You've gotta be
An enemy,
Like Wario or Dr.Wiley.
I'm learning from mistakes I've made each time I die.
I'm fine,
I'll retry.
You've gotta be
An enemy
Like Wario or Dr.Wiley

You're the princess and last boss at the same time
I got shot down but I'll try to get up
I've entered my code and now I've got 99 lives.

I need a strategy guide to get me
To the other side of this draw bridge.
Pull it out from your feet.
I'll make you fall in love with me.
Timing is key
I'll make you fall in love with me.

You've gotta be
An enemy,
Like Wario or Dr.Wiley.
I'm learning from mistakes I've made each time I die.
I'm fine,
I'll retry.
You've gotta be
An enemy
Like Wario or Dr.Wiley

You're the princess and last boss at the same time,
I got shot down but I'll try to get up.
I've entered my code and now I've got 99 lives.

Up, up,
Down, down, left, right, left, right,
B, A, select, start
Now I'll play you all night.
Now I'll play you all night
Now I'll play you all night
Now I'll play you all night

You've gotta be
An enemy
Like Wario or Dr.Wiley.
I'm learning from mistakes I've made each time I die.
I'm fine.
I'll retry.
You've gotta be
An enemy
Like Wario or Dr.Wiley.

You've gotta be
An enemy
Like Wario or Dr.Wiley
I'm learning from mistakes I've made each time I die
I'm fine
I'll retry

You're the princess and last boss at the same time
I got shot down but I'll try to get up
I've entered my code and now I've got 99 lives.

Autobot Love Song

I see you from afar and want to get to know you
but i can't find a way to relate to
another human being and not sound like an ass
my life is dark as space or the inside of a crank shaft
lets merge like Devestator and take on over the world
cause you and me are like Hotrod and Arcee
but i'm cooler than judd nelson could ever be
and you may think that that comparison stinks
cause their colours really clash but i look good in pink
once i get to know you will you transform into
a heartbreak on wheels
the last thing that i see
is your perfect silhouette as you drive into the sun because
you're not convinced that i'm the chosen one
forget about Ultramagnus
i'm the one who'll get the Matrix
and though my wreckless ways seem dangerous
the perfect life on Cybertron awates us.

Cutie Stalker McCutie Stalk

do you know the one about the girl and the guy she ran into?
he spent the rest of his life playing "i spy"
well you should
that girl is you

i can be your best friend or your worst nightmare
ensnared in my fantasies
and my daydreams
if only we
could get around the fact that
you're not into me

you're 5 foot 3
weight 115
your favourite colour is blue
shoe size is 5 and a half
you love to take baths
and you sleep with my eyes on you

yeah, i'm a stalker
but its your fault
cause you're so damn hot
and you're my cutie-stalk

well honestly
you're creepy
and you're too messed up to get with me.

Darryl:Contest Winner # 1

about a year ago
we had a contest you'll recall
in which someone won a song
all for and all about him
as his luck would have it
a guy named Darryl went and grabbed it
we's been waiting for a year
for this song thats all about him

darryl
he's 20 years old
from our nations capital
and he's got no girlfriend
although that been told
his best friend is
some girl named laura

darryl says that PS1 is somehow better than PS2
well that makes no goddamn sense cause 2 does everything 1 can do
a honda prelude
and an older brother
he runs a website
and lives with dad and mother
he likes his asian chicks
he's ambidexterous
and he was born in south africa but we're assuming that he's not a racist
darryl: contest winner #1...

Disclaimer

i promise not to start this off with the words "i'm sorry"

i'm sorry if and when i hurt you
(just know that i won't mean to)
but i'm starting off this relationship wrong
and i know its not your job to
undo
make me feel i'm wanted by someone
i guess you're feeling like your "plan B"
the runner up, or contingency, part 2
hey baby, you just gotta believe me
i promise thats not what i'm trying to do
oh yeah

so here's my disclaimer
i work on retainer so
just know that no contract with you can undo my past
so here's my disclaimer
my word of reminder that
our rebounds are just rebounds later on
when we look back

and today i had a setback
well more like a flashback
when going through a box of my old things
and i came across a photograph (uh oh)
and tears came flooding down with memories
and you could call it reminiscing
but the reasons that i'm with you are all wrong
but i'm hoping that you stick with me
cause thats the one thing that she hadden't done
oh yeah

i promise not to end this off with the words "i'm sorry"

For Miles in Denial

the past six weeks she felt like the feeling had gone
but he can't seem to handel seeing her go
from what he sees it seemed like the feeling was strong
so how could she just break up and tell him move on
try to let her go but its hard to follow through
the more she thinks you think shes coming back
the harder she'll try to disprove that
he tells his peeps that shes all that matters
he's past his peak
he wont find a better one
so why'd the perfect girl for you move on?
why move on?
were things as good as you would like to lead on?
its simple but its true
its a typical
manipulable
thing to sink to such a level
a sinking ship
a desperado
clinging to another vessel
for miles in denial.

Fully Ready, Fully Prepared

I’m gonna drive myself mad again
my best friend says, “don’t you know you do this all the time”?
I heard about another crush I’m in
I’m going to go hook up with her and help fill my ego in
I’m fully aware that this will go on and on ‘till another catches
my eye. I’m fully prepared to sell myself short and go with it.
 I’m fully aware that this is for all the wrong reasons entirely,
 but this part’s too much fun for me
I’ve gone and driven myself mad again
her best friend tells me, “she’s been hurt too much”
but I never wanted to commit
well maybe I said I did, but I don’t remember it
it makes me feel good about me
enjoy it while it lasts, sorry
its boring to be on your own
seemed like a good idea at the time
line by line as i justify whats in my mind
i had no way of knowing that id make you cry or my interest
would decline in such a short time.

Get Me The Rock Outta Here

the clock is slowly ticking by
but not as slow as i would like it to
if i were closer to my dreams
i would want this time to speed on through
i wanna rip out all the pages of my calender
be standing motionless in time forever after
cause every empty day that passes by without a forward movement
i wanna give up

how am i supposed to feel better when i don't really feel anything
at all?
how am i supposed to get better when i don't really get anythin
at all?

get me the rock outta here
if something's going to happen you'd better make it snappy
i wanna dissapear
get me the rock outta here
i'm losing all my senses
i'm going numb
defensive
and feeling insecure

its been 5 years
and my bedroom mirror
only has to show me a face thats losing hope
if only it wasn't there
i wouldn't care about reflections telling me i've gone nowhere

"i am the immesurable potential of all that was, is and will be,
and my desires are like seeds left in the ground
they wait for the right season and then spontaneously manifest
into beautiful flowers, enchanted gardens, and majestic forests"

if this doesn't happen soon
i think i'll be reduced to
an unfeeling mess of depression
whu-uh-oh-uh-oh

Girlington

just around 20 years ago
between toronto and buffalo
the sky opened up
and angels fell
on the city of burlington

some of them moved up to oakville
and like, 2 of them moved to hamilton
and no one denied
or questioned why
they changed the city to girlington

girlington
you're blessed and you're cursed
girlington
you're average at worst

Guess I Gotts Guess

i've got more hang-ups than a bad telemarketer
but will she meet me first before she disconnects?
and i hope and pray that she initiates this conversation first
because i'm scared to death.
i couldn't be less appraochable if totally engulfed in flames
when we finish, pack and load the pettit van.
i'd just like to hear a nice remark from her because this loneliness
is wearing kinda thin.
guess i gotta guess why all the girls avoid me like poison.
is it 'cause i'm seven feet wide,
or i act like i'm seven years old?
is there a point to wondering,
and pondering,
and over-thinking this?
or should i finsh my set,
load the van and leave?
is it something like she thinks she's being a pest?
do i look dumb?
is something in my teeth?
my biggest problem is that all my favorite girls
are too shy to talk to me and i'm so nervous i could hurl.
so i try to talk to them,
but i keep my mouth shut and end up looking like a snob
'cause i'm afraid of screwing up.

How Do You Giftwrap A Young Boy's First Broken Heart?

hip hip hip hip horray
you went and dumped me just before christmas day
even though we were/ just in 7th grade
i had an old enough heart to hear it break
how do you giftwrap a young boy's first broken heart?
woo hoo
and what would you write in the card?
and what if i found out that this would happen a thousand more times
would i even bother?
it wasn't the worst,
but it was the first time
and it set the trend
of lonely winters that never end
i was caught off guard when your phonecall came
you gave me my gift earlier that day
and in the most poetic way
it broke my garbage pail when i threw it away
it wasn't the worst, but it was the first time
and it set the trend
of frustrating relationships that badly end.

I'll Bury You At Makeout Creek

i'm not to blame if i didn't try hard
i never claimed to be the perfect guy
i'm not to blame if you're a retard
yeah, i'm a jerk but so am I
i'll bury you - i'll break your heart.
we sucked...it's what i needed.
i'll bury you - i'll break your heart.
i know by now that you were a rebound
i was alone when you came along
you can't compare to the new girl i found
by this tomorrow i'll be gone
heart broken i thought you'd be the one for me forever.
you made me a mixtape, we wrote out the words together.
it happened so fast and went downhill from the start.
i guess you just used me to fill the gaping hole in your heart.

I'm Down With That

its friday night again.
i'll call you when my parents leave
i'll see you then.
we'll hang in the back room.
invite our friends from school,
the usual,
the eight of us,
including you.
the last time until june.
watching late night talk shows.
crank the stereo.
the FULLBLAST filling the room.
i wouldn't change a thing.
i hope things stay the same.
hit the store, ride the snake,
walking under the moon.
we'll just hang out with no plans at all.
i'm down with that.
we'll sit and shoot the shit and watch our favourite
movies all night long
put on a movie
something crazy like bloodsport or UFC.
the girls getting into it too.
we'll just hang out with no pants at all.
i'm down with that.
we'll sit and shoot the shit and watch our favourite
movies all night long.
forming friends and wicked memories we won't appreciate
until they're gone
who needs it all when you're "blah blah blah blah blah"
with friends you love.

Me Moving On From Me

in order to move on
more than knowing that it's done
i have to hear i didn't waste your time or three years of your life
like a good movie when it ends;
you're not sad,
you're glad you went
'cause of the memories.
did we have memories,
or were they so bad that you dumped them too?
please let me know that i helped to make you grow.
something
anything,
so i can let the past go,
move on to another girl,
treat her right and not have the trouble of thinking that i probably
ruined her life.
help my moving on from me.
i don't want you back-- i don't.
I realized that a year ago.
we grew apart as you grew up and became incompatable.
but the way that it was left has me thinking i had wrecked your life
left bad memories. are there memories of me that still make you smile?

Mistletoepriation Of Funds

how can you say that
our love is over
its seems like yesterday that
i was spending loads of cash
on your pretty face
in attempts to win your interest back (you saw that it was waning)
as the months got colder

its a mistletoepriation of funds
spending money on that special
someone who wound up breaking my heart
on at least a million other things
i would've rather spent my bling bling
rather than spending on you

new years day you
said our love was over
i wish you hadn't waited
till i had spended loads of cash on
your ugly face, bitch (what happened to your christmas cheer?)
you came along and drained it
along with my bank account
that didn't rhyme
on at least a million other things
i would've rather spent my bling
like paying a vagrant
to kick me in the testicles
yeah its better that spending on you.

Mr. Obvious

All the ladies say, hell yeah.
All the fellas say, hell yeah.

I'm Mr. Obvious.

why are all my friends
asking you/ if you like me?
i didn't ask them to
could it be i'm not as subtle as i think i am
and though its not my thing
i offered to
drive you to this party
anything for you
i've got a crush like the back of a garbage truck its true
i do, i do
on you, on you

i'm out of my element and i'm not acting myself
i'm trying too hard

as soon as we arrive
you left my side
i stared at you all night
i guess that i
was alone in not knowing that you were there for another guy

he's beside you
i'm behind you
everything you do means everything

i like to keep crushes a secret
i pride myself on being descrete it
takes a special person to get
my defenses down
i'm a mess...

Oh, I'll Get Her Alright

She left her sweater,
I'll get her number,
I'll get her here for forever,
Maybe by the weekend,
She'll be my girlfriend,
I get retarded.

Girl of my dreams,
Sit next to me,
Night at my house group of friends watch TV,
Heard she likes me,
Have a feeling,
Can't watch this film cause,
I hope this will be,
A moment in time I can put in my sampler and loop it,
Forever and ever cause I feel so good it's stupid.

She left her sweater,
I'll get her number,
I'll get her here for forever,
Maybe by the weekend,
She'll be my girlfriend,
I get retarded just hopin.

Girl of my dreams,
Sit next to me,
Neither of us know what to do to proceed,
Hand by her knee,
Trying to read,
Thoughts on her face as I look, suddenly,
Something will happen if we continue like this,
It's this knowledge and feeling that makes this part the nicest.
Maybe I'll hold her hand.

Pretty City, Bad Times

This town is a custom made crazy

it fits me like a personal haides
locked down all my fears and all my pain
home is calling
one time and it never got better
two times and my face was redder
three times all coincidence shattered
something's got me scared like a hunter with antlers
it constantly goes horribly
but then it came to me one night
on a cramped flight with a bad movie on,
next to a screaming child in a bad mother's arms,
I thought to myself is this where all my life's gone?
in a pretty city with a beautiful view,
where nothing is gained and nothing ever comes true,
bad times sometimes spark a healthy change in you
I know that I sleep at night
with my newlyfound insight
bad luck can be positive despite overwhealming odds
everything will be alright
I'm always waiting on tomorrow
i'll thought out plans don't follow through though
it all happens for a predetermined reason
and scales don't favor sides
darks skies
declines
bad times
cycle like the seasons
and make for pleasant highs.

Simple Song, Simple Plan

(guy): her locker's down the hall.
i've counted seventeen from mine.
girl): does he see me?
does he even know that i'm close by?
(guy): we're in the hallway always at half past nine.
(girl): would he ever get to know me?
would he take the time?
(guy): just need to find a way to break the ice, then i'll be fine.
(girl): how to initiate, to set the tone and catch his eye?
(guy): i ask my buddy. he's got a simple plan to try.
(girl): i'll ask his friend i know and maybe get him on my side.
(friend): simple song, simple plan.
(guy): i'll walk up and grab her hand?
(friend): you don't have to say a word.
guy): 'cause if i did i'd lose my nerve.
(friend): you like her...
(guy): ...and she likes me. we'd make eachother's lives complete...
(guy and girl): ...but if this is so simple,
why are we so scared to meet?
(guy): dressed in that hoodie she looks so cute that i could die.
(girl): was it worth it? i picked these clothes with him in mind.
(guy): i want to tell her so, but i'd stop breathing...i'm too shy.
(girl): i wish he'd talk to me - i'd talk to him, but be denied.
girl): please tell your friend that i'm in love with him.
(friend): i'll tell my friend that you're in love with him.
(girl): and if he laughs just tell him you're joking..and then...
(friend): and if he laughs i'll tell him i'm joking and then
(girl): ...just let me know, i'll cry myself to sleep. alone again.
(guy and girl): we're both retarded for eachother, why is this hard?
we're spending time being scared when we should be in eachother's arms.

Stupid Christmas Song

a polished royal blue
just like my other one
guitar I should've bought that day,but i was dumb
so I called my mom and hinted pretty strong
"christmas day is coming, i found a present for your son"
sunshine melts fresh snow and dreams
i hinted for two weeks
every lapse in conversation I said,
"this guitar, mom, you should see".
and as a gift a happy christmas this would be.
feeling pretty good/ with confident desire
i start to write a song to suit my new guitar
so when that morning comes
and my parents give with love
they'll hear the perfect song performed by their perfect son.
opened christmas morning stash
went through all my gifts
they had let me down
but I got a load of cash
I'll go to the store and buy it myself
boxing day was closed
not to worry i'll come back the next day
the next day it had sold
left with this song and no new guitar to play it on....

Used (To Be Alone)

when i first saw you i knew i had to have you
and you have me too.
but all this time we’ve spent you’ve just used me to keep them away.

i wish you’d stop pretending,
‘cause i don’t get the message you’re sending.

i don’t want to say it,
‘cause i’m bound to be alone for the rest of my life,
and i think i’ll stay that way.

(here we go again) i’m down with being your shield from other suitors
to keep them away.
but all this time we’ve spent has made me aware of every breath
you take...

i wish you'd stop pretending,
cause i don't get the message you're sending

i don’t want to say it,
‘cause i’m bound to be alone for the rest of my life,
and i think i’ll stay that way.
i don’t want to say it,
cause i’m used to be alone,
and you’re using me to be alone too.

What I Want

I met you last night,
it was love at first sight,
if only for me and not for you
I played my cards right,
you think I'm alright
"if only I knew what I got myself into"
its not like I'm used to getting anything I've ever wanted
I didn't choose to be the petty stalker I've become
so you're asking your friends "so what should I do?"
I've targeted, markered, and underlined you
I've done this before "the rumours are true
I'll keep calling and calling till you love me too
did you get my message or the letter that I sent to you
I wrote "I love you" in my blood a hundred times its true
I want you and I to be together
impossiblilities won't phase me
and all these things that seem to stand in our
way won't get you out home free
you better hope to god you come around
'cause you're what I want
I think of you I dream of you,
incorperate you into everyday life
I'd kill for you I'd die for you,
I'd bury you just to make you mine
I live to far away,
and I'm too young for you,
my parents don't like you and I'm not in love with you
I'm probably wasting my time
trying to ruin your life
but I can't help it
when you're batting your eyelashes
you're probably doing just fine
far from my twisted heart
but I think maybe you want me too.

When Scott Got Dumped

i bet you won’t take this well
it’s not easy for me,
but i must separate this one identity.
i just need to be me
that means not being with you,
but i won’t forget all we’ve been through.

i can’t make you understand, our three year unity must end.
i can’t make you understand, you and i should just be friends.

i’ve reached a time in my life where i need to be free
to make choices only for me. you know i love you to death,
but i need space to breathe -- to discover what’s really me.

You're Champagne And I'm Shiznit

i never gave you all that you needed
i'm so full of me, i forgot about you, babe
this time apart gives you time to see that
all your new guy friends wouldn't treat you like that
you're champagne and i guess i'm shit
and looking back i guess I see why you went through with it
and now this coming to terms has me blaming myself and not you
if i can ever get to see you
know this time that we'll be on a different level
now that i can relate to your opinion of me
i never gave you all that you needed
i'm so full of me, i forgot about you, babe
this time apart gives me time to see that
all your new guy friends wouldn't treat you like that
when you called me and spoke about him
i thought you lied to me or changed your mind on a whim
but once the nausea passed it all fell into place for me
he's a dreamcast and i'm atari
and i'm a dork for even making that analogy
and its abundantly clear why you made that choice last may
i've moved on its for the best.